


Something Spicy

by lizette_antoinette



Category: Kuroko no Basuke | Kuroko's Basketball
Genre: Comedy, Drabble Collection, Fluff, M/M, Multi, One Shot Collection, Shounen-ai, Slice of Life
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-01-08
Updated: 2016-04-12
Packaged: 2018-03-06 18:11:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 3,707
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3143783
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lizette_antoinette/pseuds/lizette_antoinette
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A collection of drabbles and one shots where Kurobasu boys - and girls? - are working hard to spice up their personal lives.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Kiyoshi/Hanamiya

**Author's Note:**

> Kurobasu with all its characters belong to Fujumaki Tadatoshi.

~*~

"Yo. You're back early. Did little puppy Kiyoshi get lonely?"

Kiyoshi folds a still dripping umbrella and takes in the sight of Hanamiya sprawled on his couch in Kiyoshi's sweatshirt and a pair of moss green boxers, thankfully his own.

After getting kicked out of the college dorms for seducing the headmaster's son, Hanamiya nonchalantly popped up on the doorstep of Kiyoshi's cramped rented room with a pair of suitcases and a provocative smirk. Apparently, it was his New Year's resolution to piss off Kiyoshi, Hyuuga, Seiring and just generally the world.

"Um, hey."

"Is it still pouring outside? Man, nothing stinks worse than a wet dog."

"... Sure."

"Is that all you've got? Damn, this is boring."

Hanamiya attempts to get up, but instead plops rather ungracefully onto the floor. "Oops..."

Kiyoshi blinks at him. It's not unusual for Hanamiya to openly enjoy himself while irritating Kiyoshi with his antiques, but this time smells kind of fishy.

"Are you..." Kiyoshi scans the room more carefully and sure enough... "Are you _drunk_?", he points at an empty beer can sticking out from under the cushion.

"Oh, that? I had a beer," Hanamiya waves him off dismissively, "and then another one, and another... You were pretty well-stocked on liquor, Kiyoshi-kun."

"What do you mean 'were'?"

"Now now, let's not get too hung up on the details. It's supposed to be a compliment. Take what you can get."

Hanamiya finally manages to pick himself up and stretches like a cat, flashing Kiyoshi a view of his pale stomach. He then comes up to Kiyoshi, crowding him in their tiny genkan* and stares up at him in that supercilious Cheshire cat manner that never fails to unsettle him.

Kiyoshi can feel a dangerous vibe radiating from the other's body. He squares his shoulders and forces himself to return the stare until Hanamiya breaks it off with a drunken laughter.

"Worried?" He smirks at Kiyoshi and leans against the wall, finally giving him more space. It's probably because of the state he is in that his movements have become more relaxed and... fluid albeit not very precise. "This is why goody-two-shoes like you make me sick. "

"Because we worry?"

"Because you don't know what you want. Or to be exact, because you don't _want_ to know. You'd much rather hide behind your Mother Teresa act. Otherwise, what if you get really pissed and then you'd be just like us?"

"And 'us' would be..?"

"You know, the sneaky bastards, the nemesis of everything good and sparkly in this world... You're asking an awful lot of questions today."

"Yeah well, you seem to be a mood to talk."

Realizing he's still standing in the doorway like an idiot, Kiyoshi quietly toes off his shoes and awkwardly stumbles back to lean against the door.

Hanamiya of course picks up on that and sticks his tongue out at him.

"Speaking of bastards... no wait, that's not it. Speaking of sneaky, your wife dropped by. Threatened me with eviction. Again."

"You don't even officially live here. The only one who can get evicted is me... Wait, I have a wife? But I'm not even out of college yet."

"Heh, yeah. That Megane-kun, what's his face?"

"Hyuuga?"

"U-huh. He's got a pretty foul mouth on him when he gets his panties in the bunch."

"Hyu- " Kiyoshi can feel his face getting hot and curses inwardly. "He's not my wife."

"Did you know your ears turn red when you get embarrassed?"

 _Dammit! Can he have_ any _privacy with this guy?_

Before Kiyoshi can scramble together an appropriate comeback, Hanamiya jumps to his feet and closes in on him again, suddenly flicking Kiyoshi's earlobe between his fingers. "This is rather nice," he purrs, "great blackmail material."

"Stay away from me!"

_Jeez, he's done it again. He threw Kiyoshi off his game just for kicks._

To Hanamiya it's like a child's play.

Kiyoshi still doesn't get why, when he is around Hanamiya, all his 'iron heart' composure goes out the window.

Hanamiya studies his expression hungrily. _(This is definitely some kind of weird power trip for him.)_ Then slowly lifts himself off the floor.

"Well, this has been fun. I think we better end it on this happy note. I'm going to bed. Don't forget the breakfast tomorrow. I take my eggs sunny side up. Oh and," he adds more like an afterthought, "don't come into my bedroom tonight."

"Since when have I ever.... Wait, you have a bedroom?''

"I do tonight."

"But there is only one room. Wait, Hanamiya!" Kiyoshi hastily follows him only to witness to his horror Hanamiya spreading his, Kiyoshi's, futon and unceremoniously climbing into it.

"No, seriously, where am _I_ supposed to sleep? Hanamiya?"

"What do I care, figure it out.. The couch?"

"No, we've talked about this. It's too small for me... Hey! Don't just fall asleep."

"Then take the carpet like the good puppy you are. And turn off the light on the way, will you?"

Kiyoshi remains just standing there, utterly stunned, watching Hanamiya curl into a ball under the covers and drift off.

He mules over the situation for a while, but in the end decides he doesn't have the heart to kick Hanamiya out after all. Maybe he should get drunk himself? That's one way to survive a night on the couch with his legs sticking out almost to his mid-thigh.

Kiyoshi sighs resignedly and reaches for the half empty bottle.

"You take as much as a sip of that, it's gonna be an indirect kiss."

He almost has a heart attack.

Knocking the bottle off the low table, Kiyoshi manages to catch it in mid-air, juggling like a Chinese acrobat.

"Are you asleep or not, dammit?!"

"Don't make so much noise."

Hanamiya rolls over, one long naked leg appearing from under the blanket.

Kiyoshi clears his throat and gives a carpet at the front door a doubtful look.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *genkan - traditional Japanese entryway area


	2. Hyuuga/Izuki

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I admit it right from the start – the puns aren’t mine. I really can’t think of a single one myself. My brain just isn’t wired that way. So I collected them from all over the net. Which in all honesty wasn't all that hard. Enjoy!

~*~

“Okay, give me another one,” Hyuuga sighs resignedly.

Izuki has been torturing him with his puns for the last twenty minutes and he is beginning to think that maybe staying for Riko’s extra special after-practice training menu would not have been such a bad idea.

Izuki perks up. “Uhm,.. okay. What do you get if you drop a piano down the mine shaft?”

Sigh. “What?”

“A flat miner!”

There is a pause. Then Hyuuga bursts into muffled laughter.

“Heh,.. yeah, ok, that was actually pretty good.”

“What do you mean by ‘actually’?” Izuki pouts.

They head through the park, using every inch of shadow to hide from the beaming sun. It’s hot. Cicadas are loud, the children playing on the nearby playground are loud, even a barking Chow Chow is making too much noise. They spot an ice-cream stall and Hyuuga can practically see stars in Izuki’s eyes.

“Want to get some?”

Izuki is already sprinting for it. “The one to get there last, pays!”

_Dirty bastard!_

“Not fair, dammit!” Hyuuga huffs, fishing for his wallet.

“It’s not my fault you’re so slow. Still, you’ve mustard the strength to ketchup to me.”

“Just shut up!”

Izuki gets a chilly-choco flavor. Hyuuga gets to pay for him with the last of his pocket cash.

“Why would you get something like that? It’s supposed to be sweet.”

Izuki probes the dark cream with the tip of his tongue. “Because I like it. Want some?”

Hyuuga wonders about that. Riko trains them to the point of fainting daily. And the school doesn’t get any easier. He’s had another day from hell. So, yes, he does want some. Just not the ice-cream.

“H-Hey…” Izuki almost drops his waffle cone when Hyuuga pulls him against his chest.

“It’s all right. No one will see.” They are in a pretty much deserted part right now anyway.

“But!..”

“Shun, just for a moment, ‘kay? I really need this, badly.”

“Fine. Just a bit then.”

Hyuuga could swear there is nothing like a feeling of Shun wrapping his arms around him. All of his fatigue seems to just melt away.

He bends his head and kisses Izuki fully on the lips. Then smirks down on him as he pulls away.

“Spicy.”

Shun’s blush is beautiful.

“Idiot, that’s the ice-cream,” he mumbles and turns away.

Oh, Hyuuga would so love to just drag him off right now and lock him up somewhere, where no one will disturb them, and have his way with Shun. No really, a clubroom, an empty flat, an elevator, anything will do.

Damn, he sounds like a dirty old man even to himself! Oh, but elevator sex is good on so many levels. With or without pun, if you wish.


	3. Takao/Midorima

~*~

“D’you know what I’m called?”

Midorima is just looking forward to the quality time spent over a nice book, when Takao plops himself in the chair next to him and sprawls on it.

“What do you mean?” Midorima glares at him over a copy of Rashomon. What he really wants to ask is _‘why the hell are you here?’_ , because as far as he’s concerned there is no such word as ‘library’ in Takao’s vocabulary.

“My name,” Takao winks at him cheerfully.

“Of course I know your name. What are you talking about?”

“Okay, let’s hear it then.”

“Huh?”

“Say it.”

“Takao…”

“My full name.”

Midorima can already feel the faint itching in his left hand. Ever since they had se– .. grew closer, this has become a regular order of things. Takao spouting nonsense and Midorima itching to strangle him.

“Is this some sort of another failed joke? I’m not following…”

“Let’s just say, I know where I’m headed with this. C’mon, play along now Shin-chan, you want me out of your hair, right? So you can read your.. pretty book thingy.”

“Haaah, fine. Takao Kazunari.”

“Good job! Now just the last bit.”

“Kaz… Why? You are being weird again, Takao.”

“Pretty please?”

“Uh.. Ka.. uhm.. Kazunari.” _Damn!_ He can’t believe he’s blushing from just that.

Takao is gleeful.

“That’s it, Shin-chan! Good boy!”

Suddenly his face is next to Midorima’s ear, breath hot on his ear-shell.

“Now just remember it the next time I’m making you cum.”

Midorima drops his book and his jaw.

“T-Takaooooo!”

The brunette, already in the doorway, blows him an airy kiss. “It’s Kazunari, baby.”


	4. Kagami/Kuroko

~*~

“I don’t think this is gonna fit,” Kagami wipes a drop of sweat rolling down his forehead.

“It’s okay. We tried it once before with Aomine-kun.”

“But, but it’s so _tiny_.”

“It will stretch. And it’s not _that_ small.”

“What if I rip it?”

Kagami gets smacked on the head.

“Ouch!”

“Will you stop worrying?” Kuroko scowls at him. “We don’t have much time.”

“Right. Fine. Just don’t say I didn’t warn you.”

He inserts the head first.

“I can’t! This is just… _ouch!_ ”

He gets smacked again.

“Will you quit it with the abuse?!”

“Then stop being such a child, please. Do you want to get out there when you are like this?”

“Pushy brat!”

Two minutes later Kagami barges out of the changing room, wearing a shirt four sizes smaller than his own.

Kuroko exits after him, smiling at his vaguely blushing sempais. Bless Kagami for his innocence, this is just too much fun.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I've always thought this was pretty much self explanatory, but apparently sometimes those things make sense only in my head. So to make sure it's clear to everyone, the premise for the drabble was as follows: Kagami forgets his practice T-shirt, so Kuroko lends him his own. The rest is just your overly-inflated, hormone-powered imagination. Now go get your minds out of that gutter.


	5. Kasamatsu/Kise

~*~

Kasamatsu gets the being officially together part.

At least he thinks that he does.

He gets buying groceries for two on his way home after the lectures. He gets the 'Kasamatsu & Kise' sign on their tiny apartment door and at the bottom of the Christmas greeting cards. He even gets the long moments of stiff suffocating silence when he accidently answers a call from Ryota's parents, it frustrates the soul out of him, but he gets it.

What he absolutely _doesn't_ get is all the touchy-feely, cuddly stuff that Kise seems to attach such a crazy importance to.

Waking up at 5:30 in the morning every day to find himself practically infused with Kise's body, their legs entangled in anatomy-defying ways and sharp peaks of Kise's hipbones digging into his belly, Kasamatsu can just feel the blood rush to his head, popping one vein after another like popcorn. No, he doesn't fucking get this part at all.

So when Moriyama shows up on their doorstep on Christmas Eve, cone Santa hat sticking out proudly like a unicorn dream and a life-sized pillow for Kise under his arm, Kasamatsu just about has a hysterical fit.

"Oh my god, you even got the expression right! I just…! I don't even…"

To Kasamatsu's rapidly increasing horror Kise is rolling around on the floor hugging a pillow that's got none other than his, Kasamatsu's full body picture, plastered on it, wearing boxers and not much else.

How in the name of all the kami did Moriyama even get a picture like that?

"Moriyama, you bastard! You freak! What the hell? I think, I'm gonna kill you…"

"I think I'm gonna kiss you! This is the best freakin' Christmas present I got like ever!" Kise throws himself at his former senpai with sparkling eyes.

Over the blond's shoulder Moriyama gives Kasamatsu a cat-like little smirk.

This is what he gets for complaining to that guy every living day during the lunch break. It's the last time Kasamatsu thinks of anyone as a friend. Ever.

"I also sneaked a photo of him from behind, so I had both sides done," Moriyama delivers a finishing blow.

Kise squeaks almost faintly and grabs the pillowed Kasamatsu's ass.

Kasamatsu chocks on his Christmas umeshu.

Moriyama practically purrs.

Despite Kasamatsu's repeatedly vocalized protests, Moriyama ends up staying for dinner. Every next year without a girlfriend seems to make him more and more prone to suck out other couples' intimate moments of happiness kind of like a leech, or at least that's Kasamatsu's modest opinion.

When they finally manage to get rid of him, it's well past midnight. Kise hits Kasamatsu with a sloppy kiss and drags his tired, thoroughly intoxicated body to bed, leaving his boyfriend to have an afterparty tête-à-tête with the dishes. It's not until two in the morning that Kasamatsu finally tugs his pajamas on.

The blankets on their bed are piled up into a messy mountain, which inevitably happens when Kise is in charge of them.

With a sigh Kasamatsu lights up a night lamp and.…. and holds his breath, feeling ambushed.

Kise is curled up in a ball on the edge of the bed, hugging the ill-fated pillow like his life depends on it. His bare thigh slung over the two-dimensional crotch, he drools quietly on the picture's cheek and mumbles 'Senpai'.

Slowly, carefully, so as not to disturb his sleep, Kasamatsu strokes a few stray locks of hair out of Kise's handsome face.

Ok, so maybe he does get it a little. And maybe, just maybe, Moriyama is not going to find his boxed lunch sprinkled with arsenic one of these days.

His pillowed twin gives him an ostentatious look.

Kasamatsu frowns down at it and slips under the mountain of covers, pulling Kise into his arms. He's not getting jealous of a freaking pillow. At least not tonight.


	6. Murasakibara/Himuro

~*~

Himuro Tatsuya knows his own worth. Not in a narcissistic way. Not really. But let’s just say he’s seen himself in the mirror.

It's not one particular thing, or anything. Well, there is that too of course. There are long eyelashes and a nice smile. There is his height and that playful mole under his eye. And it's not like his looks are all there by some accident, or a fickle will of gods. He styles his hair every day and he works out. It's just,.. even nature's benevolence and his own efforts aside, there is this... _air_ of suave allure around him, that makes men and women alike choke on pheromones when in his close proximity.

A slightly drunken Alex once described him as sex on two legs and while he does think it sounds corny, Himuro tends to agree with her. Not because he is so full of himself, but because he is of an analytical mind and he can see where she was coming from. Even if he does say so himself.

And that is precisely why having to constantly share the first place in his boyfriend’s heart with a pack of snacks is just… well, let's just say Himuro isn’t exactly thrilled.

So of course, when Atsushi’s birthday arrives, he knows just the right thing to give him.

~*~

Murasakibara comes back from practice as always late. Arms full of birthday sweets, he elbows the kitchen wall, until he hits the switch. The light twinkles a few times and comes on, illuminating the rows of bowls and plates, the table and… Himuro.

Atsushi freezes in the middle of the room and just stares.

Himuro has made himself entirely too comfortable on his kitchen table, covered in an elaborate pattern of (by now dried up) liquid chocolate and whipped cream.

Chocolate and whipped cream only.

“Oh, Atsushi, perfect timing,” Himuro purrs. “Be a doll, help me clean up this mess.”

The snacks fall to the floor.

Murasakibara steps on them, still in his tennis shoes as he makes his way to the table in two giant strides. Not that he gives a damn. Who cares about store-made candy, when there’s a top notch desert served right in front of his nose?

“Your birthday cake,” Himuro whispers into his ear, wrapping his arms around Atsushi’s back.

~*~

A few hours and a number of empty whipped cream bottles later they snuggle in Murasakibara’s bed exhausted and entirely sated. Himuro’s face is buried in the purple hair, a trace of cocoa still visible in the corner of his lips.

Murasakibara licks it clean, deliberating that this particular brand of desert might very well just be his favorite.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was typing in the name of the pairing, when it dawned on me that I had written 'MurasakiBAKA' instead, you know, Atsushi's actual name. I sat there laughing for half an hour. It's now 4 in the morning and I think my flatmate is planning my murder.


	7. Midorima/Takao

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Takes place right after the end of Shuutoku / Rakuzan match.

~*~

86 to 70, Rakuzan’s victory.

 _Line up, bow, thank you very much_ and all that… Takao doesn’t even have the words to describe what he’s feeling as they head for the changing room.

“What? Is Shin-chan heart broken? Sorry, I can’t really comfort you right now.” _He_ is the one who needs intense comforting, dammit! What with those tears running down his face.

“Hmpf!”

~*~

Half an hour and one shower later Takao slams his hand against slick tiles of the shower stall as he fights to gain much needed leverage, while Midorima is down on his knees right there in front of him, manhandling Takao like a pro.

And who cares about Rakuzan now when his only thought is to find something, anything, to grab on to before his own knees give out on him completely, because, _fucking hell_ , that’s some comforting!

The other boy tears away momentarily, with a loud wet noise.

“Feeling better now?” he asks matter-of-factly.

_Since when did Shin-chan become so shameless? And what the hell is he doing with that finger..?!_

“Yesss,” Takao hisses.

“Good.”

“No, wait!” he amends quickly, when Midorima starts to pull back. “Now that I think about it, I’m still a little bit upset.”

“Hmpf, is that so?”

Midorima looks up to give him just a tiniest smirk and goes right back to the business at hand.

Takao is running his fingers through messy green hair that now grew wet and dark, and pliant to his touch . It seems he does have words to describe his feelings after all.

Losing _sucks!_

Thank all the gods, quite literally.

 


	8. Takao x Midorima - another one

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah, it's them again, I just can't help myself, I guess. I love writing them both.

-xxx-

"Kyahahahahaha!"

The Shutoku locker room takes one look at Takao's face and bursts into a collective laughing fit. And he tried so hard to slip in unannounced.

"Screw all of you!" Takao mutters under his breath, making a face at the room in general, which in turn makes him wince. "Shit!" He pokes his swollen black eye carefully and makes another face, this time twisted with pain.

"The hell did you do?" Miyaji leans on his locker next to Takao's, studying him with pissy curiosity. "Just don't tell me you walked into a door."

The rest of them haven't butted in yet, but Takao can practically see the perked up ears. Damn those busybodies! 

"It's not really your business. Now if you can just get out of my way," he slaps a mocking "senpai" at the end of that and half expects Miyaji to kick him in the nuts. But Miyaji seems to be in a surprisingly playful mood today. He just shrugs and shakes it off. "Stingy! Fine, how about this? If I score more than you during practice, you'll spill your guts."

 _How about you kiss my ass?_ Is what Takao would really like to propose.

Miyaji gives him a huge evil grin. "Unless of course you wanna take this chance as an excuse for having your ass kicked by me. Again."

Takao slams the door of his locker in Miyaji's face. He was already having a bad day.

"You're on."

He'll so own this annoying pest.

-xxx-

In the end Takao's head hurts so much he can't even see where his passes are going, gets yelled at and gets benched.

-xxx-

"So?" Miyaji corners him in the cafeteria during the lunch break. Kimura is tagging right behind him. 

So they are multiplying now. That's just great. "So what?"

"We're all ears." Miyaji steals a fry from Takao's plate and wiggles it in front of his nose.

Takao steals it back and stuffs his mouth with it.

"Fine! Have it your way, you shameless people you!"

"Uhu."

"I got kicked in the face. There! Happy now?"

"By?"

Sigh. "By Shin-chan, of course."

"For?"

"…"

"C'mon now, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty!" 

Okay, remember how he thought Miyaji was surprisingly _playful_ today. Well, scratch that. Creepy. Creepy is the word!

"Oh, for fuck's sake! We were, you know…"

"No."

"Che, fine. We were doing it," Takao lowers his voice to a whisper, "from the back. Shin-chan, he… Do I really have to say this?"

"Don't make your senpai wait now, lover boy!"

"Senpai, my ass! Anyway, he doesn't usually like it that way. But Shin-chan's butt… it's just, you know, like, too sexy, or something."

Miyaji chokes on his juice. "Don't tell me, you actually kissed Midorima in the ass?! Gross!"

"Louder, please! I don't the back rows heard you there… And no, I didn't.. _kiss_ Shin-chan's perky tush."

"Oh?"

"I bit it."


End file.
